Friday, December 14, 2007

A Poem: by Edward (Pampers) Kamperman


I was shocked and moved to tears by a recent poem recitation by the drunken poet laureate, Edward (Pampers) Kamperman.

Although his insight to the human condition is flawed, his understanding of philosophy limited to fortune cookies and his stage presence similar to that of a pet rock, his poem has touched our hearts.

THINK that I shall never see
A drunk as silly as me.

Me whose hungry mouth is prest
Against the Zums sweet flowing crest;

Me that looks at God all day,
And viciously attacks instead of to pray;

Me that may in a drunk stuper wear
A nest of robins in his hair;

Upon whose bosom snow has lain;
Who intimately hits on women without blame.

Poems are made by fools like me,
But only God can forgive an idiot like Me.

10 comments:

Anonymous said...

Christine Wilkonson said Ed shut up so I can eat my burger, I wanted it super sized. Bob did you eat my fries?

Anonymous said...

Geez, I used to like this site, but you area really losing it. I mean - this is just wierd. I'm starting to think you're out to make JPCA look good by making yourself look like a raving lunatic.

Thomas said...

Kamperman looks like Phyliis Diller on steroids

georgetheatheist said...

- Burma Shave

("Stupor"..puleeze, youse da dikshunery.)

Mike said...

Christina is focusing on the cheeseburger and is not appreciating the poetic prowess of the drunkin fool in his stupoooooooor

Helga said...

I've seen Ed at the local German Restuarant...he came up to me and asked, "is that a brautwurst in your pants or are you happy to see me".

Thank god it was actually a brautwurst

Bob Holden said...

Ed is a vile old evil hair dye using scotch drinking studdering fool.

C Wilk said...

I'd do Ed for a hamburger! Fo sho

mv ben said...

From what I understand, she will do both Ed and Tony Tulips - just add those curly fries!!!

Anonymous said...

Is Ed reciting from Mein Kampf?